I know it's really pointless for me to blog right now since my page is down, but I'm so damn frikkin' bored. I can't go out. There's nothing on TV, even the web is beginning to bore me. And of course, I just can't do stuff that have been waiting on my dusty desk. I need to be entertained, desperately. Crap. I can't even smoke a cigarette to pass the time. I got 2 wisdom teeth pulled last week and have been quite queasy, quite groggy, and quite dreadfully puffy ever since. The swelling has gone down, but I still feel like I have a cotton ball stuck in my right cheek. Grrr.
I have to agree with most of Athena's points in a recent entry. A point though about those staunchly anti-Erap who blame him especially, for all the bad shit that've been happening since he became president. I think he is sort of the key to the door that had begun to open during the impeachment trial. All those connected to him were also connected to the unbreakable system, even institution, of corruption. It was almost a purging, everything was coming out, even Cayetano with the Vizconde Massacre. So while I'm glad Erap is out, I'm feeling uneasy about the trial not being followed through and how quickly the events have unfolded. (Then again, sino ba ako, who the hell am I?) I'll be keeping close watch on whether Erap will actually face the charges he faced in the impeachment trial, now without the "privileges" worthy of a president, but I won't hold my breath.
I really hope they put Estrada on trial and not let him flee the Philippines like Marcos did in '86. Right now, reports say Estrada does not intend to leave the country. Hmm, let's see what happens.
Hey! Are you gonna be in NYC tomorrow afternoon? Even though Macapagal has been sworn in, I think going to this is still very relevant and very important. The road to justice has just begun:
Please join the Erap Resign! NY, the Coalition to Oust Estrada-NY, Philippine Forum and MAKABAYAN tommorow, in front of the Philippine Consulate 556 5th Ave. at 46th st. NY, NY at 2:00 pm for an emergency mobilization.
Bring your songs, prayers and messages of support.
A broad united front has been formed, with progressive peoples organizations at the forefront of the resistance. Filipinos and friends in New York City and environs while far cannot just sit on their hands but should express their solidarity, sympathy, and support for the struggles of the Filipino people against the corrupt and brutal Estrada government.
In this spirit, an emergency mobilization will be held to express our solidarity in the United States with the massive nationwide anti-Erap protest movement in the Philippines.
My friend sent me this, to make fun of me and all the (too many I suppose) emails I've been sending out regarding the current situation in the Philippines. Funny:) I'll translate this later.
From Associated Press (daw):
"...as to the mystery surrounding the defection of Defense Minister Orlando Mercado, who many had pegged as the ultimate Estrada loyalist, Mercado himself explained the circumstances behind his turnaround. "Nung nag log-on kasi ako sa paborito kung web zine kahapon, aba eh, sinarado nila yung site in protest of the no vote. That's when I knew. Kung thumbs-down si erna at ang maarte, 'di thumbs down din ako. Erna! Plis lang, hindi na ako makatiis! I want my Maarte!"
Wow, the events are quickly unfolding in the Philippines, so fast that I can barely keep up. I think so many people are clicking on to the Philippine Daily Inquirer's minute to minute coverage that I can't even access it now. I couldn't get into the ABS-CBN News cite either. CNN is too slow with the updates so the only recourse is Yahoo's daily news. Just type in Joseph Estrada and voila! all the news feeds and incredible photos at your fingertips.
(this is for you, H.) Friday evening could've been perfect. Free food, free drinks, good company, delicious variety of foods to choose from. It's called Master Grill and if you're ever in Flushing, (yes, Flushing) Queens, you can't miss it. Even from afar, it looks like a real classy...err...car wash. It's one of those Brazilian steakhouses, all you can eat meats for $20 or more that seem to be popping up all over NYC. Maybe in your town too? Anyways, Friday coulda been perfect. I mean who could ask for more? And of course, me being me, my wisdom teeth decide to come out and give me a mind-numbing pain I've never experienced before. Ask me how many buffets I've been to in the last few days that I have not been able to enjoy because of the dang wisdom teeth? Ask me, just ask me, and I may just have to poke you real hard.
"We will not be put down. We will not be silenced. We will not stay quiet and meek while the combined forces of the presidency, the party in power and his criminal cronies conspire to insult us, dupe us, turn our heads around with lies and gimmicks."
This is an Open Call for photographs, poetry, and other forms of creative commentary (or just plain commentary) on the current crisis in the Philippines.
According to news sources, a million protesters are expected to march on Malacañang from the Edsa Shrine within the next three to four days to demand President Estrada's immediate resignation. People Power II rallies continue throughout the country. A nationwide civil disobedience campaign will kick off today.
maARTe aligns with the thousands of Filipinos mourning the death of truth and reason, and lends our voice to say: "Tama na, sobra na, palitan na!"
We want to know what you are thinking and feeling. It is a time to Voice Out and Creatively EXPRESS! Send submissions to maARTe@arkipelago.org. We will be selecting submissions posting them on the site on a rolling basis as they come in, and hope to post a link to the Philippine newspapers so that our voices are heard in the Philippines.
Speaking of wisdom teeth, I may have to get mine pulled out soon. That, or live with this unending dull (sharp at the at its worst) pain. Hmmm, now I know what "dizzying pain" means. And believe me, you would not want to experience it. Been taking unauthorized extremely potent prescription ibuprofen since Saturday just to be able to bear the pain, which has been a constant since Friday evening. I'm now down to two pills. Crap.
I am on a mission. I want to find Laarni Enriquez and send her on a plane back to the Philippines. She's in NY! Come on Pinoy peoples, you must have a sister or brother or cousin or tita or tito or mother or father that knows a friend who knows a friend who works there...hehehe...
Have you noticed that my blogs are longer lately? Almost essay like, no? I have The Samsons by F. Sionel Jose to thank for that. I guess I already knew this, but have been waiting for the right book to inspire me. Reading really does help with writing. Ha, who woulda thought. I'm almost done with the book, only 5 or 6 pages to go, and I'm still sitting at the edge of my seat, wondering what's to come. I was so pissed that my read was cut short by the lack of delays in the trains this morning.
I get positive feedback about maARTe every so often, and I get this wonderful feeling of elation and excitement...which is shortly followed by feelings of frustration and ineptitude. Yes, it looks nice and all but it could be doing so much more. We could update more often, we could have more staff people helping with the layout, we could have more writers and copy editors. There is so much that is possible with a project like maARTe. We could even change the world, even if it's just for a few folks that get inspired by maARTe and decide they want to make positive changes too...but no, right now, so little is done. And it is hard to change that. Most of us have full time jobs, or school and obligations to other organizations. For the most part, we have lives. Haha. And I guess we're not ready to give that up yet for a dinky little webzine called maARTe. Every so often I get these silly ideas in my head, like, hey wouldn't it be great if I could do this full time? Wouldn't it be cool if we could actually pay our staff? Wouldn't it be great to tell all the stories we hear about all the things our community is capable of? Wouldn't it be great if the world knew what great things Filipinos were capable of?Wouldn't it be great if this were a money-generating webzine rather than an "in-kind" only project? Is it crazy to think that my silly thoughts are possible? What if I took the plunge? What if?
Okay, that ends the daydream portion of today's blog. Now WAKE UP! *sigh*
Don't you hate it when you do a search for something on your favorite search engine and you get back thousands of pages of which probably only 5 or 6 (if you're that lucky) have anything to do with what you are looking for? Well, i've been getting a few hits due to the "unluck" of others. I apologize, I didn't mean to write about hoochie skirts or Ely Buendia pictures or Erap caricatures only for you to come here, disappointed at the result of your search. And then comes the daunting (often useless) task of searching the site manually with insane hope that you will actually find what you are looking for, going through my archives, through the other parts of the site. Well, I intend to lessen the time you have wasted in coming to my site. I mean, I'm glad you're here, but I don't want you to stay any longer than you want to. So if you're here, by mistake, or you're lost, look to your right, salvation is there. Otherwise, welcome! Please stay and have a look around...
I just wanted to clarify that I don't want to undermine the efforts of people who try to promote positive images of Filipinos. Listing accomplishments made by the Filipino community is really, really great, even though it may be a bit skewed towards mainstream celebrities and those in high positions. When I attended a Filipino Youth conference a few years back, one of the handouts we first got was a list of positive role models from the Filipino community. And seeing all of those people on paper for ther first time, regardless of knowing about some of those listed, I was in awe. I felt a real sense of pride and was so grateful that organizations like FAHSI were doing something as important as teaching Filipino Americans at a young age that there was ALOT to be proud about being Filipino.
My point was that it shouldn't stop there. While reminding ourselves of what we, as a community and through individual achievements, have accomplished, I don't think that our self-esteem as a community, as a culture, as a people, can rise just from that alone. I believe that the key to "promoting a positive image of Filipinos" is understanding our history (in the Philippines and abroad), good and bad, and accepting, not polishing or trying to hide the negative actions of certain Filipinos. I mean, I hate Filipino (and Asian and minority and...etc.) stereotypes as much as the next grrrl, but don't you think that if we had the slightest inkling of understanding of ourselves and our people and our history, we wouldn't give a hoot about what shit people say about us? I don't know, it's such a complicated issue. But I do know that if we know ourselves and know where we come from (individually and historically), or even start to put the effort into doing so, that's when the real positive change can begin.
Do I make sense? Geeez, it's real late, and should hit the sack soon. Expect edits of the above statements. heh. :)
The Samsons by F. Sionel Jose makes me wish my morning and evening commute is longer. Now if that's not an indication of how good this book is, I dunno what is!
I don't think I'm as happy as I thought I was though I've been more "stable" than ever. I'm so tired of my tiredness, of my laziness, of my lack of drive. I don't cry as much as I used to, although I think my newly groomed temper is to thank for that. So I guess that means I haven't progressed much, huh? Hmm, such are the depressing thoughts that creep up on a Friday night when you know you should be out partying or something but you're home because you have awful stomache cramps and it's yucky and cold in NYC. I'd really like a glass of red wine right now. Hee:)
Eek, 'ka hiya. Miriam Sanitago is what Pinoys would deem pikon, or as some Filams might say, pecan.
I wrote this to a friend recently about the current situation in the Philippines: What's going on now in the Phil. is like worse than I could ever have imagined. I still can't believe what's happening. Di ba parang isang drug-induced nightmare? Di ba?
These are some reasons why I'm proud to be Pinoy, even more so to be Pinay! Galeng talaga natin. For every Erap, there's a Clarissa.Watch out!
I recently received an email about the need to bolster the image of Filipinos, for the sake of the "younger" generation (hmm, does that still include me?) and it listed the current Miss America, Gen. MacArthur's nurse, and Jocelyn Enriquez, the "Oriental Madonna" as reasons to be proud to be Filipino, or more specifically, Filipino American, I suppose. While I love Jocelyn Enriquez, the email just irked me. It gave me the impression that we should be proud because of the "many" Filipinos in high positions, including ones in the Bush (past and current, I think) administration.
Hello?? Like, gag me with a spoon!?!
I mean so freaking what if Rob Schneider is half pinoy? (Ok, maybe I think that's just a little bit cool, didn't you love him as the "copy guy" on SNL?) Though images of Pinoys in the mainstream media may be a nice superficial boost to us "FilAms" it isn't quite the source of pride I rely on.
I'm proud to be Pinoy (Pinay, Filipino, Pilipino, FilAm, however way you say it, it's still rooted in the old colonial master, Spain's King Philip, duh!) because my parents are proud to be Pinoy, because they told me about their upbringing with no shame, they taught and constantly speak to me in their native tongue so much so that I can speak it too. I am proud of them, no, not because they are doctors or laywers or professionals or entertainers -- which, I would like to emphasize, they are not. I'm proud of them - mom, a domestic worker and dad, a doorman - because they are true to themselves and proud not inspite of their societal "position" but because of it. And because of that, I am proud of my heritage, my background, my culture, because I have had the opportunity to be around people who can't help but be themselves and not only unashamed, but proud , no matter how certain members of society (Pinoy or not) may look at them, simply because of their occupations.
Okay, I just rambled, so I'm sure I'll be back to edit this. Ha. Back to work.
Do you like my page? Really? Then help me keep it going! Blogger, as annoyingly slow as it has been lately, is a great thing. It helps me update this page as often as it does. It helps maARTe to update too! It helps me hardly work all day to entertain you and me. Hehe. I don't think donating $5 ($10 and you get a neat sticker!) is too much to ask for, do you?
Neat! I found this site a while ago and lost it. Don't you just love finding Pinoys telling their stories on the web? Even if you have to find it again? Uhh, yeah, whatever...
