So feeling actor kami ni B last night. I didn't know what to expect - all I knew was that if Ralph Peña (of Ma-Yi Theater) was not only part of it, but heading this, it ought to be damn good. And I'd regret not being a part of it. Then I get there, and JoJo Gonzales (he played Gen. Ledesma in the play, Dogeaters) who is a totally hilarious actor himself was there. So there's about 15 of us, mostly amateurs, and we're gonna be in this 20 minute piece basically breaking down the Declaration of Human Rights into a language we can understand - some of it we act out. We've got 2 rehearsals left til the performance on Dec. 8th for a Human Rights Event taking place at the Puffin Room. I'm totally excited. Yay:) Its also the same day I gotta take an exam that will determine whether I stay in graduate school - I hear official word next week, but with the folks in the department I"m applying to telling me I'm in, I'm somewhat comforted. Woohoo, I get to quit soon. I know I said I was gonna quit the day after I hear definite word of acceptance (which I actually haven't) but considering I'm feeling absolutely broke, I might stick around til early January at my job and then give myself a week or 2 to prepare for three full time semesters back to back. I'm excited. I like the direction that my life is going...
eeewww, my voice sucks. its whiny, and strained. argh. why did i tell people about the show. argh. i was practicing today, and b suggested i tape myself - i can't even remember the reason now. gad awful, argh. last saturday, we had a full day rehearsal -10am to 4pm, okay i strolled in at 10:30, but only coz h said the band wouldn't be doing anything til then. so there. and so, we sang all the songs, including the ones with solos. and all the soloists screwed up at one point or another -either we cracked, i got a frog in my throat halfway thru one of my solos, or were simply out of tune. it was gad awful. but it was all of us, so it didn't seem so bad, ya know? coz we could like blame the dust from the construction of the stage, the dampness of the basement hall - i, myself, could blame it on going out to FC and then Nell's the night before. but today? no excuse. and i heard myself too! argh, i suck and all my friends and family will be full witness to it. argh. double argh. so damage control this week consists of the following: no chocolate after wednesday, no more than one cig after wednesday, and friday, saturday and sunday no smoking at all. oh, and lots of ginger tea. and sweet red wine maybe. i always ended up singing the solos after communion, so maybe that will help - the red wine. hehe. let's see. oh well. argh.
So even though it's over and I really only helped out with the cultural event of the conference, I realize, I still have a lot on my plate, not even including maARTe, which is sadly still not updated. Here's my internal list:
-Practice Emmanuel, Silver and Gold, and Lean on Me, as well as other xmas songs for xmas show that starts on 11/30!!
-Learn how to and make yam and marshmallows for thanksgiving dinner, coz after all, I am an American, as many like to remind me.
-Update college thesis and polish it up for submission to academic journals
-Work on creative works (Tsismis, Purgatory, Balikbayan Box, Gift of Tongues) to combine in to one published work
-Work on getting arkipelago's conference off the ground
-maARTe TV
-Help new organization, Transitions off the ground
-Help new Filipino arts organization, Pintados, with December 8th event
Sheeeeit! I wish all these "after work" projects could be my full-time job! I should be extremely stressed about all of this, but instead, I'm rather giddy. I'm almost glad that things aren't perfect and that I hate my job so much, as weird as that sounds. Because right now, the good things in my life are soooo good that if everything was perfect, I'm afraid that all the good things would end too quickly. Geez, do I even make sense? Put simply, as difficult and different as life is right now, I am happy and fulfilled. And that's a good feeling.
The cultural program Saturday night was FIERCE!! I could not believe it. I mean I was already excited at the line up I knew we had, so I knew it was going to be good. But it far exceeded my expectations. Despite the problems that arose (starting an hour late, our audio equipement including the AHEM, mic (!!) not coming, what I thought was gonna be a disappointingly small crowd, getting kicked out of the venue, halfway through - shit, i can go on for days, so i'll stop there), halfway thru the show, we found a better, cozier venue to continue the show, and geeeeez, ALL the performers were good! I think this is the first time I can honestly say that about a n event. And SHIT! I emceed and I wasn't shaking or nervous?? What's goin' on??
I wanted to invite you all to a conference on Filipinas that will be held in
NYC this weekend.
I'll be facilitating one of the workshops ("Defining the Filipina in America") on Saturday and hosting the cultural program that evening. I do hope to see you there! It would be great if you could come to the entire conference, but there are rates per day ($30 for the whole conference, including breakfast on Saturday and Sunday) and the cultural program, "Ating Diwa: A Gathering of Voices" is open to the public, $5 for non-conference participants. Please feel free to forward this message to anyone you think
would be interested.
I hope to see you there. I'm pretty excited about the program Saturday night, coz Kuttin Kandi, more known for her turntabling skills is gonna perform a spoken word piece that is sooooo fierce...Also, being a huge fan of Kontrast (of which mr. model minority is part of), I'm excited bout their participation as well...much much more to tell you about tomorrow...
So I'm digging through my old disks to find old papers and writings, and guess what I found? My senior thesis - on Filipina domestic workers in NY. I should post it up or submit it somewhere or something. It's not exactly the best piece of research but it's a waste to have it collect dust. I actually gave hard copies to folks that eventually formed 2 factions, errr, groups for domestic workers for Pinays here in NYC. Anyways, the basis of my new story was one of the women I interviewed. Her name is Josi now, Pinay was a bit too obvious and corny , I realize. My initial plan was to transcribe all of the interviews I did, but I got lazy (oh, and something about a deadline) and ended up just taking the most relevant parts of the interviews for my final thesis. You'll see more questions than answers, but the answers are still pretty revealing. When I did the interviews and listened to the tapes afterwards, I saw how much more eloquent the women were when they spoke in Tagalog. Well, duh, I guess. Here's part of the transcript of "Josi's" interview.
Hi I just heard the news here at work (in manhattan) about the plane crash near the JFK airport...just wanted to let you know that we're all fine. Mom is at work in the city...dad is probably stuck in traffic on the Van Wyck Expressway on his way to Brooklyn...and I'm here at work in Manhattan. Thought its a bit too close to home, we are relatively far from the crash scene.
If I wasn't so scared to fly, I think I'd just hop on the next plane to Manila. Canlubang seems like as safe a place as any these days, right?
Anyways, just wanted to let you know that we're ok, shaken of course since its almost 2 months exactly since the first disaster....Hope you are all well...
Shit, really? I'm not being sarcastic, I'm really not. I think I'm addicted to news lately too. Not just any news, real news (not non-news like Ashcroft telling he us he doesn't know anything more than the day before) about 9/11 and its aftermath. I can't get enough. All day, I refresh CNN and when I get home, the first channel I hit on the television is CNN. Even B noticed. He refused to let me watch the news while he was over this weekend. I don't even listen to the current segment, I just look at the running updates at the bottom of the screen. Some people have found solace in religion, I guess I've found it in the news. Oh, one more potentially psychologically damaging thing I've been doing is reading Underground: The Tokyo Gas Attack and the Japanese Psyche by Haruki Murakami. This is probably not a good thing to read (as intriguing a read as it is) because I have to take the subway to work everyday. This probably explains a little bit of why I've been taking the express bus way too much lately. To be honest I think the book is actually helping me understand what's going on. I realize now, nearly 2 months later, that my mind has not fully processed what has been going on. Even now, I immediately think another terrorist act has occurred whenever I hear or see police/fire sirens. Weird.
In other also banal news, a story is coming together slowly in my head. It's weird to have the main character living in my house and I don't yet know where fact and fiction will separate. All I know is the main character's name is Josephina "Pinay" Josefa. Pronounces PEE-nay. I actually know someone nicknamed PEE-nay. Aling Pinay works at the Filipino Food store down the block from my house. But the story's not about her. It's about a woman, highly misunderstood by her friends and family. Only up to a 3rd grade schooling in a fictional town called Ilawan in southern Luzon in the Philippines. She's a housekeeper. And her best friends are priests. She's been in the U.S. for 15 years, exploited and unpaid for 7 of those years. Undocumented. Determined to get her visa before she goes back "home" to the Philippines, where one by one, the members of her small family are dying. She has $75,000 in savings. She talks very loudly on the phone and among friends, but is as quiet as a church mouse at work. She works 3 jobs, and Sunday is her only day off. Her family in the Philippines keeps the canned goods she's sent them in a cupboard in the kitchen and it is covered by the kind of clear plastic you used for school textbook covers and is held together with industrial staples. They have not touched the cupboard in 3 years, when her last sibling died. The story starts with the main character's second to last living relative dies. She finds out over the phone. The story will be voiced from her point of view.
